Coping Tips From Other Youth...

Are you worried about your parent being deployed? These tips will definately help you cope! Check these out:

Ask for truthfulness… In other words, encourage your parents to tell you the truth and not to shield you. It’s normal for parents to want to protect you but we both know that you want to be treated like an adult and find out the truth about your parent’s deployment.

Talk about it … Or at least tell people around you (friends, teachers, coaches, employers etc.) about the “D” situation. Even if you talk about negative stuff, its okay… and it’s normal. And don't forget to test your distress.

Explore the “D” destination: Get out a map, globe or atlas… Check out where your parent is going. Learn about the weather, the way people live, and why they need the CF there. It’s interesting to discover that the more you learn, the more you have in common with your deployed parent. Why not propose to your geography teacher that you do a special project on that country?

Most likely, your parent will be deployed in a country that is experiencing some chaos. You may want to learn more about the political situation there… or you may not. That’s okay. However, keep in mind that there may be lots of newspaper coverage on that country and that what is written is not always true. You might want to watch the media coverage with an adult or someone that understands the conflict. They will put things in perspective.

Keep a journal… Many people (not just girls…) find that writing down their thoughts and feelings is comforting when they are separated from a parent. It is also interesting to be able to look back and read how your feelings evolved over time.

Be helpful at home Yes… you can make a difference at home - especially if you have younger brothers or sisters. Be proactive and try to make a difference in your family. By assuming more responsibility, you will gain respect and freedom.

How can you do this? Here are a few ideas:

Commit to a few chores a week to help your other parent.

Stop, look and listen to your younger sibling(s). They may feel more comfortable confiding in you than in an adult. Offer to listen and encourage them to talk. If anything unusual is said… perhaps let your parent know. Remember, acknowledging their feelings and reassuring them can bring lots of comfort.

Stay focused on your life: Make sure you stay focused on school, work, sports, friends… and other activities.

Stay Connected:Check out these tips on managing long distance relationships.

Check out these stories and video (high res or low res) about how other youth felt when their parent was deployed.